Sometimes things just aren't good ...and there is nothing you can do about it.
I try to control something... anything in my life, but I have come to realize that the things I thought I had control over... well... I was only fooling myself...
In a split second at many given times, I have watched as stations or accomplishments...really anything in life that I thought I had attained, or that I was blessed to enjoy for a time, just fluttered away like the impossible to tame butterfly that finally found an opening in the jar...
I control nothing... and so I am afraid...
I need to control something... I need situations to be fair and for justice to prevail...
I am learning that only happens in good books and on TV.
It becomes ever so dreary and unbearable. When I can't take it any longer, it becomes imperative that I escape...
only to where can I run or hide?...There is no where...no place...
It has to be dealt with... it has to be felt and it has to be faced.
I can not bear it today however... so here is to more strength tomorrow.
Of course I know this is where I am suppose to have faith and trust the one who is in control... my Lord and Savior...
...sigh...I wish I had that faith... but... I don't
No comments:
Post a Comment